The Diet Joke Overeating Advisory System

The Diet Joke Overeating Advisory System

The current threat level is Orange.

 

Why Food is Confusing

 

White wheat or wheat white? You tell me.

I picked this up at the store today because I couldn’t resist. What the heck is this, I said. Whole Grain White? What is that? Wheat white or white wheat?

 

The best thing since sliced bread. Wait. It is sliced bread.

Turns out it’s both. It’s sort of milatto bread. 70 calories per slice and 1.5 grams of fiber (I guess it’s more white than wheat, after all.)

The Diet Joke – New York or Bust!

In honor of our upcoming trip to the Big Apple, I picked up some Ben & Jerry’s New York Super Fudge Chunk ice cream. A half a cup has 20 grams of fat, and 11 grams of saturated fat. That’s more than half the saturated fat most of us ladies need in a day. As they say in New York, “Oy vey!”

Portion Control Check-In

A half-cup of ice cream is about the size of a tennis ball, but not as bouncy.

It’s in the Bag

 

How many Cheetos in a 99 cent bag? More than you’re supposed to eat at once. According to the bag, a serving is 21 Cheetos, which, it informs us is “just the right amount for crazy, cheesy fun!” Here’s the whole bag in a bowl.

21 Cheetos Salute!

 

Here are 21 Cheetos counted out. It’s the bowl on the right, which I ate for some crazy, cheesy fun! Then I started to eat the bowl on the left, because I wanted some more crazy, cheesy fun. (Who can control themselves when they’re having so much fun?) Then — you won’t believe this — there was no more crazy, cheesy fun. All the crazy, cheesy fun was gone.

The damage: 380 calories, 24 grams of fat, and 700 mg on sodium.

Diet Plan Pizza

With special “Ageless” oxygen absorber packet! Delicious, they say in the ads! I didn’t try it, so I can’t say, but I think a new pair of tennis shoes comes with that same packet.

Size Matters!

What? Diet Plan Pizza isn’t as big as it looks on TV?
Only 5 inches.

 

 Fast Food Bargain

$3.50 for all this! Amazing!
Jumbo Jack, 2 beef tacos, small fries, medium Coke.
1570 calories, 65 grams total fat, 1951 grams total sodium. (Ketchup and cheese extra.)